I love arguing [talking] about politics. In the good old days, people staked out a position on the right or left and went at it. However, lately I have been encountering a particularly vicious strain of pseudo-impartiality that is sweeping across Cuban-American circles. The reasonable, open-minded, just weighing all the facts person, who miraculously always ends up opposing conservative positions. They are ‘the reasonable guy or gal’ [RG].

In the good old days, this person would have constituted a liberal in good-standing. But since Liberalism has fallen into such ill-repute–even Barack Obama can not afford to be seen with her–they pretend not to recognize familiar views. Too bad, some things are worth being mocked about, as young conservatives or old conservatives with bad memories will learn. Apparently having a consistent political philosophy is too ’20th century’ for these cutting-edge, new-age firecrackers. You can almost feel their desire to have an original political thought, or at least one not recently spewed out on the CNN, MSNBC and Fox meat grinders of political discourse, they’re so … common.

RG’s will always eventually oppose whatever they sense to be prevailing view among their tribe, it’s a way of differentiating themselves. The impartiality dance is their way of holding out for the intellectual version of dinner and a movie. In effect, those of up front about our ideologies are the intellectual version of ‘hey, just no motels OK.’ For me there are 3 political points of view, the honorable left, the honorable right and the gutless pretenders mucking up punching lanes like some drunk Richard Steele wannabees.

You’re So Reasonable – The Musical

You walked into a room designed for spin
Like you were undecided on the day of a caucus
Your vote strategically hidden behind a Baldwin
If you switch, it could really focus [last word to be pronounced as if an elderly Cuban guy was speaking]
You think this post is about you, don’t you