Recently, a Cuban government ministry [i.e. the Castros] issued a comically ungrateful statement bemoaning the fact that the recent Obama administration loosening of travel restrictions did not go far enough.
It made me wonder what a Cuban government official would say if they could speak with impunity.
Do you think your statement will have an effect?
No, but it gives our compañeros in the press an excuse to repeat our appeals.
Is pleading for compassion for a such miserably failed state really in your best interests at this point?
Clearly it may have reached its limits, but we are all grateful for the work. If you would of heard of some of the ideas we rejected, perhaps you would understand why we do what we do.
OK I’ll bite, like what?
We have studies which show that Cuban-Americans getting Federal aid through Medicaid are only sending us 19% of their net remittances. That number was in the mid 20’s just a few years ago. We believe they can and should do better.
Why haven’t they been as generous?
Frankly, the trend towards the use of ALF’s–not this kind–has been a serious blow to the Revolution’s financial planning. We hope to see some improvement by the so-called death panels. The end of life spending is just out of control.
What will you do now?
Our options are limited, once a patient is accepted ….
No, I meant the Cuban government.
Well my mandate is to get the remittance number into the 30’s.
Does not seem terribly realistic.
I view it as my personal sugar harvest quota. Look, no one likes to say it, but given the realities of the shift in Congress, a tragic humanitarian event is our best chance to move the needle on this issue.
Like a hurricane?
Yeah, but we’re not even in season. Then again, I was sure in 2008 that Hurricane Ike was our meal ticket. That’s one of the negative side effects of being part of such a lengthy revolution, all our assumptions get to play themselves out. It’s been a problem truthfully.
That was impressive. You just described the government’s ongoing abject failure in neutral terms.
Like Allen Iverson says, practice, practice, practice. In Castro’s Cuba, progress is exclusive to the future.
Seriously, no Plan B.
Hey this is a 50 year old regime. The Mouse That Roared wasn’t just a movie to us, it represented a plan. We’ve been propped up by countries in four continents and outsourced to a fifth — we hate the cold and Australians.
Plan B? We’re on plan Omega brother.